More Christmas'

I'm off today for my second Christmas. I won't bother writing a poem this time. Both this year have felt very rushed as I wrap and shop at the last minute. It makes me wish my life was a little more organized. A lot of things are really complicated and confusing right now (and that is all I'm going to say about him.)

Merry Christmas

I have presents still to get, and presents still to give
Shopping still to do, and traditions still to live.
Merry Christmas to all and have a great year
I hope this season brings you lots of joy and some cheer.
(Oh such a bad little poem, but written in less then 2 minutes since I'm heading off to Si and Dan's for more Christmas stuff. I love winter and Christmas is such a great holiday. Everyone have a good one!!!)

Hungover on Horseback

After a great night at the bar I had to wake up early to head to the barn to see our family friends new horse. My mom has been riding him for a while now and takes lessons on him on Saturdays. This isn't a picture of him, but he is very similar. This breed is known as Icelandic and they are very short and get really fuzzy in the winter. I think they look like My Little Pony's. They are considered Horses though not Ponies, despite how tiny they are. I took a lesson on him and he is very much the dream horse for any 5 year old little girl who asks Santa for "A Pony".

Longest Night

Last night was the longest night of the year, literally. Just like June 21st, my Dad's birthday, is the longest day of the year. I spent most of last night driving back from Tremblant and then the rest passed out on a mattress in my old room. My old room is at least no longer a recording studio, it is now My Little Brother Mike's leisure room, TV and game consoles etc.

Going Going Gone

Ok, Dad and Ter just showed up and we are taking my laptop into Future Shop to get cleaned. I will be essentially off the grid for a while. Have a good time this Holidays.

Dirty Bunny

Everything my bunny does is adorable! The thing eats its own poo, and is cute while it does it. Mind you lately I have been fairly lazy about keeping the cage clean, so the poo has piled up. I don't want him to get sick, or my roommates to evict me, so I'm going to change the the shavings. He deserves it, he is perfect in every little bunny way.

Pleasure

Now that my exams are over I can actually read fun books. Books that aren't hundreds of years old, amazing works of literary genius, or by great Canadian writers. I was running late for work today and knew that since I was closing I would need something to amuse myself with during the down time. Not wanting to bring my laptop, or buy a new magazine, I went looking for something good to read. My New Roommate is gone for the weekend with her boyfriend, The Boy Roommate, so I snuck into her room and borrowed a book. It was an interesting combination of single girl chick-lit and high school loser angst, an edgier Judy Blume. I just devoured it. I read all through my shift and then when I got home tonight, read it in bed. I just finished it and as you can see from the time stamp on this post it is quite late. I hope to wake up early enough tomorrow to pick up the sequel from the library in the morning before I go to work. Teri is also bringing my the newest Harry Potter to read over the break. Reading for pleasure, pure perfection.

Yesterday Today Tomorrow

If you had to relive yesterday, would you do anything differently? I don't think I would, manly because I try to live with out regrets and wishing I had changed things. Also right now I feel like my life is pretty hopeless, boring, pathetic, depression and cyclic.
Hello
What can I get for you today?
6" or footlong?
On which bread?
White, Swiss, or Cheddar cheese?
Would you like that toasted?
And what vegetables can I get for you?
Would you like the Sweet Onion that goes with that?
Any other sauce?
Salt and Pepper?
This good?
Would you like it for here or to go?
As a combo?
Chips or cookies?
A drink from the fridge or the fountain?
Its the same price
$10.24 please.
From $20, your change is $9.76
Would you like a receipt?
Thank you, have a good day
*Repeat*

Finished Exams

I'm done my exams for this semester. Some went better then expected, some went worse, some were easier then I thought they would be, some were harder. I have no regrets, as always I will just learn from it and try things a little differently next time. I hope I did well and that when the marks come back I'm happy.

Holiday Mood

With exams nearly over and Christmas coming soon, this little site put me even more into the mood. I love the song, it is my favorite carol, although I say that about a lot of them.

Exams

I have my first exam today, and I can honestly say I don't feel ready. After tonight's exam it is just one after another for a while. After BritLit tonight I'm heading down to Kristin's to study for Mass Comm which is tomorrow. Hopefully we will keep each other awake and focused, not distracted and sleepy.

Favorite Family Guy

This is my favorite Family Guy moment of all time!!!!!

Variety

I can love both fair and brown,
He whom abundance melts, and he whom want betrays,
He who loves loneness best, and he who masks and plays,
He whom the country formed, and whom the town,
He who believes, and he who tries,
He who weeps with spongy eyes,
And he who is dry cork, and never cries;
I can love him, and him, and you, and you,
I can love any, so he be not true.
(*The first stanza of "The Indifferent" by John Donne, adjusted for gender*)

Danger Danger

Do not, I repeat do not, go to this site if you are in exams. It has all kinds of shows and movies that are free and broadband. This means no commercials, and you don't need to download anything. It is addictive though, and eats away at your time, so don't go there if you should be doing something else, like studying.

Black and Red

Carleton Karma

Today I got some good Carleton karma. After visiting Kristin for her birthday I hopped on the bus. I had planned to head to campus to watch a lecture in the viewing room. I woke up very early this morning, unable to sleep because I was so worried about exams and how slow my studying was going. I made a vow to myself to start going to campus and watching the lectures I need to catch up on today after the visit with the Birthday Girl. I make these plans all the time but tend not to follow through with them. I was sure that I would be leaving the missed lectures for the last minute, fail my exams, and end up on the street. Even though I got on the #7 bus, which goes right passed my house, I went to school. It took everything I had to stay on that bus and get to campus. I just kept repeating to myself, "you have to watch those lectures, you have to watch those lectures". Well I made it, I'm sitting in the viewing room and I'm half way through one. I was looking for another piece of paper to write notes on when I found the 10 pages of notes that I had lost!!! I feel great, I also have fewer lectures to watch then I thought I needed. I may actually be back on track with my studying.

Chopper

My Cool Boss brought over his new puppy last night. It was the tiniest, cutest thing ever. Chopper is about the size of half a loaf of bread and just as addictive. He just licked and nibbled me while making adorable puppy noises. I was won over, especially because he is a baby Boston Terrier which is normally not one of my preferred dogs. Trust me though, this little guy was heaven on four legs.

Failure

The plan failed. My room is now cleaner, but not finished. Studying is going slowly and I just figured out that I have over 8 hours of lectures to watch before Monday. I also have lost some notes too which is really bugging me. Thank goodness they are notes I used to write an essay so I know the material well enough to go without them. My exams are all in a row and that makes it very difficult to study for Dec. 14, 15, and 16.

The Plan

Ok, it is late at night, and I had a can of pop, Diet MC Cola to be exact. The plan is to stay up and completely clean my room so I can start fresh and study tomorrow. I have a bag of chips to keep me company and motivated. I won't post pictures this time, but trust me, tomorrow morning my room will be beautiful!

Bad Dreams

Last night I had so many bad dreams. When you wake up after a night like that it is so hard not to let it affect your day. In one dream, Binx died, so I have spent serious time this morning loving and petting her. In another, I was living back home and everyone was ignoring me. My family, O-Town Friends, P-Dot friends, Roommates, everyone was just living in my neighbourhood and completely ignoring me. When I walked outside they would move to the other side of the street. If I ran up to talk to them, they disappeared. I just spent the whole dream crying, and now I'm all sad.

Studio 60

I have seen Studio 60 advertised and written about quite a bit, but I had yet to catch an episode. I discovered a few days ago that I can watch it (and a number of other shows) on CTV Online. There are very few commercials and it is broadband, not download. I have gradually caught up and watched it on TV tonight for the first time. I hope that I contributed to their success tonight and that they continue to stay on the air. It really is a smart show, very very good.

'Tis The Season

I had my first advent calender chocolate and it is snowing. I was so excited about December 1st that I knocked on my New Roommate's door at midnight and we made an even out of opening the little calender window. Of course I have a Disney Princess one, and the chocolate is way better then I remember, not bad for $1.99.

Grandma

Ancient toys, plastic dolls
War time stories of love and life
You cooked the goose, baked the cake
Sit and eat
Eat and laugh
Sitting there next to me

Decorations in snow, skaters on ice
Yearly traditions of sand and surf
Walking slow, the slightest limp
Sit and talk
Talk and learn
Walking there next to me

I clutch what I have left from you
A crumpled scarf, a faded card
Sit and rock
Rock and cry
Praying that you are next to me
Knowing that you are right here
Next to me

Christmas In The Capital

I bought some Christmas decorations for the house. We now have a green and red garland on the side table in the living room, it acts as a Christmas tree. I also got all my roommates gifts. They were purchased, wrapped, and opened yesterday, all within three hours. I figure the rest of my Ottawa friends will be getting their gifts in the new year, since I like shopping at home rather then here.

Portugal Conditioner

I ran out of conditioner and had to start a new bottle. The only one I have left is the one I bought in Portugal this past February. Crema Suavizante Fortificante, and the only reason I knew it was conditioner and not shampoo is that it is Fructis brand and the bottle rests upside down not right side up. Now I use it in the bath and think of Europe. Though I don't have the above view or the full marble bathroom. The picture on the left was taken from inside the shower.

The Office Christmas Party

I'm trying to convince My Cool Boss to have some sort of Christmas Party. Two of my roommates went out last night to work parties, and I'm just jealous of the free food and drinks. I always had fun at work parties in the past and as you get older they get even more interesting.

The After-After-Theatre Party

As Cosmo is my guide book
Paris Hilton is my muse
The hair-straightener my weapon
E-Talk Daily is my news
So I went out this evening
And I wore my pretty shoes.

Long Point

This is where my cottage is. The aerial shot makes it look really exotic, not bad for Southern Ontario. It so beautiful and has an amazing sand beach. This is the tip of it, not really inhabited, air access only, we are closer to the mainland.

7-Eleven

I took a late evening walk with Em and Ami to the 7-Eleven to get some snacks for my essay writing. I grabbed a slushie and some chips and dip, I figured it was a good treat to eat while watching The Daily Show and Stephen Colbert. It was a nice break from typing up my King Lear essay for British Literature. I had barely had any when my stomach started to hurt. Now I'm wide awake from all the pop that was in the jumbo slushie, sick from the chips and dip, but still working on the damn essay.

Like

Today I finally learned about the new use of the word 'like'. This word already had a complicated definition, but lately has started to be used in even more ways. I have been studying the history of the English language and in the 1980's the stereotype of the valley girl used the word in a new way. In the past 20 years people have started to use 'like' as a leader for a quotation. My mom called and I was like, "Don't tell her I'm here". 'Like' is also used as a narrative, which means it is placed into pauses as someone thinks about what to say next, similar to 'eh', 'so', 'well', 'uhh', and 'umm'. So, like, that is it.

She Is Into Art

She looks so feminine
Baggy pants, layered look
Wide eyed she talks to you
Wants to help the Pigmy's in Burma
Or something
She's into art
And your into her

She smells of sandalwood
Rosehips, hemp
Incense burns as you smoke together
Save the environment
Help the large sea mammal
You believe her bullshit
And its killing me

She is the definition of petite
Short, thin
A determined step she walks with you
Sketch book under her arm
Huge bag over her shoulder
Sewn by hand, Fair Trade
No meat
She only eats organic
You love it, all of it
And you want her
And not me

First Time At The Pier

Went to Pier 21 with Kristen and The Princess. The Princess fixed me up first, taught me some valuable going out tricks. Always layer by wearing two shirts, though makes you sweat more you will somehow look better. There may have been a case of VPL (Visible Panty Line) that she just couldn't handle, but there is no way I'm switching to thongs. From 10pm to 4am, and the time just flew by. After the bar we gave Kristen her first Shwarma and then later on when told of my food options back at the house I believe I actually said "I want the ice cream and the cheese" Note to self: only eat food when sober. It was a great night, but I should really start giving out a fake number, I think it would just be easier in the long run. Why do I aim so high, but end up so low?

Get Thee To A Theatre

I just came back from William Shakespeare's Midsummer Night's Dream which I went to go see with Kristen and WifeT. It was put on by Sock'n'Buskin, a theatre group run out of Carleton. This is one of my least favorite Shakespearean comedies but I loved this production. It was incredibly done with excellent attention to detail. It is playing at 8pm, in the Alumni Theatre November 16-18 & 23-25, 2006. I completely suggest going to see it, really really amazing, done so well.

Not Again

On Tuesday I had to work nights. This means I get home around Midnight Thirty. I thought because we have time shifting with our cable that I would be able to watch House MD at 1am. It turned out that it showed at midnight only so I just got to watch the last little bit, and didn't really understand it. Thank goodness last night on Stephen Colbert it happened again, Stephen talked about House, and put a picture up. I can't handle it when they are both on one screen, it is too intense. Go watch the video, it was on a segment about People Magazines Sexist Men Of The Year, and House and Stephen Colbert both were mentioned, People knows what it is talking about!!

Daddy Editing

Growing up, we always had a large collection of movies, mostly illegally taped onto VHS or Beta by my dad. Interestingly, if it was a movie that my brother and I were allowed to watch, it was occasionally censured by him in the taping process. Usually for blood and graphic or frightening scenes, because I'm a wimp and would get upset, often unable to sleep at night. We knew this happened, and never really noticed. Teri and I used to watch Uncle Buck all the time at my house, then something happened and we lost the tape. Eventually we rented it to watch again. There were sections of the movie that had been totally missing from the copy we had always watched. Mainly the plot about the boyfriend sexually assaulting the older daughter and then Uncle Buck going after him. I watched The Three Musketeers tonight and realized my dad had done a number on that one as well. Amusingly it is a Disney film so pretty tame, but I had never seen most of the dungeon scenes before now.

Slow Morning

With one sock on I stare at the screen,
Honestly people, whats it all mean?

My First 'B'

I just got my mark back from the hardest test so far this year. I got a 78%, this is my first B of this term. Everything had been going so well, ridiculously well, but this test was long, hard, and I was not as prepared as I could have been. I still made it in above the average and with the other marks I have gotten in this class I should still be able to pull off a high mark. I wish that this had humbled me more, but really it has just motivated me to work harder and continue to get high marks. I want that scholarship back!

Million Dollar Smile

Tonight on the phone My Cool Boss said "You sound like a million bucks". I have never understood that expression. Does it mean I'm so wonderful that is what I would be worth? or I sound so happy, like I just won that much money? or successful and competent, like I run a million dollar business? When I was younger my dad used to say I had a million dollar smile and every now and then when looking at a picture he would say "See there is that million dollar smile". (I believe he said it about this one, my high school graduation picture. Man, I miss my long hair.) That expression also makes no sense to me. "Million watt smile" would, since that would mean it was a bright smile, but the money thing I just don't get.

Pill Free And Happy

My night was great from start to end. I got a drive home from work with Cool Boss's Younger Sister since it was raining. After chilling for a bit I did Tae-bo, little sweat and loss of breath, bring on the endorphins. I made salsa and cheese wiz to go with nachos. Watched movies, including Cruel Intentions, an excellent film which is seriously sexy. Some downtime in my room with my laptop, actually on my lap, which I haven't done in a while because it used to overheat on uneven surfaces. Then back downstairs to spend time painting with Ami, almost finished a picture which I will give as a present at Christmas. Now it is off to bed, feeling satisfied with a Saturday night well spent.

Nibs

Last week when I was grocery shopping I bought a package of Nibs because they were on sale and I was looking for a treat. I opened the bag a few days ago and realized that I don't really like them, mainly because they remind me of what I think Christmas Elf poo would look like. When I told Ami this, she agreed, but said it would only be that colour if the elf was hemorrhaging. Either way, I don't think I will buy Nibs again, even if they are on sale.

Blogging

I admit this post is pretty much just blogging for the sake of blogging. Must. Keep. Writing. In. My. Blog. Even if life feels pointless and unexciting. Money is tight, school is getting hard, I have a cold, and don't feel like doing anything, I keep falling into the same boring pathetic patterns, no need to write about them, again. Still I feel the world needs my mindless chattering so ... I. Must. Keep. Writing. In. My. Blog.

Pampering

I really need a day at a spa. With a pedicure, leg wax, facial, and hair cut. I totally can't afford this, nor will I be able to for a long time, but it is nice to dream.

Leisure Time

What should the average person do when they are not working? Is there more merit in watching a Documentary or a Vin Diesel film? Are we not taking full advantage of our leisure time? Should our time away from work be light hearted or serious? Is there more value in artisan or industrial production? What is the difference in value between art and entertainment? How do these distinctions compare to the difference between elite superiority over mass taste? Has the mass productivity of our leisure time brought us cultural homogenization? Should we be concerned about crowd psychology or mass manipulation in our entertainment? Is there skepticism about the consequences of capitalism, excessive materialism or even disdain towards these values? Where are we even getting our values from? Are these not moral distinctions and judgements? Possibly from a more traditional time? Have our values even changed?

Chuck Norris

- When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

- Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.

- Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

- Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.

- There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

- Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

- Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

- Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.

- Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

(Above picture is My New Roommate's boyfriend, soon to be our Boy Roommate, as Chuck Norris)

A Vision

I was sleeping the other night when I started to hear a male voice saying "Jesus is my only friend" over and over in my head. It didn't freak me out that much, just made me wonder if I did indeed have no friends (except for Jesus) or should start going to church like I always say that I'm going to. Later in the day I realised that it is actually a line from a Smashing Pumpkins song, oh Billy Corgan.

Great Funeral Prayer (Family Guy)

[Stewie and Brian are burying Brian's mother who was stuffed and used as a endtable by her owners after her death]

Brian Griffin: Say something.

Stewie Griffin: What?

Brian Griffin: I don't know just say something.

Stewie Griffin: Um And God said to Abraham, "you will kill your son Isaac". And Abraham said, "I'm sorry I couldn't quite hear that. You'll need to talk into the microphone". And God said, "Oh is this better? Hey Jerry up the reverb because I'm getting a lot of hissing up here".

Brian Griffin: Say something about my mother.

Stewie Griffin: Oh all right. Um I never knew Biscuit as a dog. I only knew her as a table. She was sturdy, all four legs the same length...

Brian Griffin: Thanks, thanks that's enough.

Stewie Griffin: Ah yes. Requiem and tarapax and so forth, amen.

The Break Up Card

I feel this concept needs to be better defined, and the rules written out. A Break Up Card can be used to get your friends to pretty much do what ever you want, go where ever you want, talk whenever you want, deal with late night phone calls, take you on trips for distraction etc. The line "I just went through a break up" just needs to be said, otherwise known as "Pulling The Break Up Card". Any time it is used the only rule is it shouldn't financially cost the friend much money. It last for:
1 Week - A peaceful break up, either mutual or self induced
2 Weeks - An upsetting break up, usually being dumped
4 Weeks- If being cheating on is a factor at all
(My card ran out today, W. and I got our 1 Week. This doesn't mean you are over the person or relationship at all, just my friends are no longer at my beck and call.)

So Late

I have totally screwed up my sleeping clock. (You may have notice I have been posting at all hours of the day and night lately.) When I want to sleep I can't, so I'm at the whim of my body, if it is tired I head to bed, even if it means long naps. This is always such a destructive pattern and leads to me being an emotional mess and my school suffering. I plan to stop this in its tracks right now: So I'm off to bed and waking up early to go and do yoga, I hope this works.

CRISIS, Mouse Crisis, Part Three

I was watching TV late tonight, when Binx walked down the stairs carrying a half dead mouse by the tail in her mouth, she dropped it in the main hallway in front of me. I screamed, as per usual, and Ami came again to take care of it, she can't handle much more of this. I then burst into tears and have pretty much been crying since. I'm just so scared and alone, it is so hard to deal with by myself, I have no where to hide or place to escape, no one to hold me, comfort me, protect me. I can't handle this, I'm not strong enough. My mouse crisis has pretty much turned into a breakdown.

Mouse Crisis, Part Two

Last night I came home with Kristen and her roommates. I gave them a house tour since TallT, WifeT, and the Princess had never seen Le Manior before. We saw a mouse, well most of us just freaked out, screaming and running away. Ami went to go look for it, but it quickly escaped. Later on, after the girls had gone home, I was typing on my computer when I heard Binx outside my room rushing around. Little mouse screams quickly followed. I started shrieking, and Ami and Em came to my rescue. After the mouse ran behind my shelves, they told me to go downstairs for a while and everything would probably sort itself out. When I returned to my room, all was fine and I went to sleep. I was woken up by noise and more mouse screams. I made a quick exit out my second door and down the back staircase to Ami's room. She went up the front stairs and returned laughing a bit later "Oh something is definitely dying up there." I had to explain to her that Binx doesn't really successfully kill them. Ami headed up again and had to finish it off, then dispose of it outside. She is the bravest person I know, you would think someone like that would be harder but she is sweet, feminine, and sensitive, yet she is still my Knight In Cotton Pajama Pants.

Belle Of The Ball

This year, I was pretty for Halloween. But is it a costume, if in real life I actually am a Disney Princess?

Pizza Hut

I have been craving the Pizza Hut family sit in meal for a long time. You know the one, it comes with a salad, garlic bread, pasta, and pizzas. I got to go this evening, I may have pulled the "break up" card to get to go but it worked. TallT, Kristen, WifeT, and the Princess went with me. It was a four course, four hour dinner, great times, good laughs.

Back In The City

My trip back home was really really good. I slept on many buses {including one with SoccarStar and her varsity team} hung out with my Dad {a local diner is expanding so we had breakfast together at the new location} exercised with my Mom {went for a walk on a nature trail where we fed chickadees out of our hands} chatting with Little Brother Mike {his life is so much worse then mine} went on a day driving trip {wine tasting, beautiful scenery, and a Natural Wonder Of The World} saw relatives {Grandparents and my uncle, because we were moving some wood} partied with Teri {she is such a good friend and she has such good friends}. I'm happy I went home and now I'm happy to be back home.

Heading Home

I'm going home, I'm homesick and I have some wounds to lick.

Gord

SoccarStar and I walked around the market this weekend. She bought a ring and a little tiny painted pumpkin. I loved the pumpkin, but was broke so couldn't get one of my own. She took it home and named it Gord. It is a confused geek, so cute. The New Roomate just carved a pumpkin for our front porch as well. It is huge, literally around 70 pounds, looks awesome. Prepping for the party!

The Conventioneers

I ran across this show and think it is great. The new Lonely Island since they all went to SNL. What makes The Conventionners great, besides that it is halerious, is that it is Canadian.

Facebook

Ok on First Year Kristen's incessant bugging, I got a facebook account. I threw some photos up on it and imported this blog so it can be read through there. Teri is so right, it is just for stalking people. I will not get addicted, I'm so against this, it is just another form of stupid myspace!!!

Halloween

*~*Huge Halloween Party this Saturday the 28th - Le Manior!!*~*

*~*Come in costume if you can, bring friends*~*

I love dressing up for Halloween. (As do Guinea Pigs too I guess... I got this picture from CuteOverload great site for tons of adorable pictures, usually of animals, updated daily.) For Halloween I was planing to be a Greek Goddess, but when shopping around I changed my mind and have a different, totally awesome plan but it is a surprise, so come to the party. Spoiler - Steph's blog gives it away if you are totally dying to know what I'm going to be.

W&C 1.5

Happy Anniversary to us. Year and a half.

Snowing!

I went out for breakfast with SoccarStar, who was in town for some games. We hadn't seen each other since I visited her in The Real Big City in February, 8 months ago. It is amazing how easy it is to fall out of touch. I hadn't even known that she went to Holland during the summer. We walked around the market as she commented on how pretty but cold the city was. I shrugged it off, she was just a soft young southern Ontario girl, the weather was perfect. After I dropped her back at the hotel with her team, I was biking home when it started to snow. Snow, before Halloween. It is awesome, though it is the sharp, wet kind so actually a little awful too. Happy First Snow Day!

Kristen/Kristin

I actually have two friends called Kristin, honestly I'm that popular. The problem is that sometimes when I'm talking about something and I mention one of them, people get confused which one I'm referring too. I usually say "First Year Kristen" or "Second Cup Kristin" to distinguish between the two. As you may have noticed they do spell their names differently. I met KrisEn (Right) last year in my 'First Year', we shared a couple of courses. She is in journalism and lives in a house near mine with her friends from residence. KristIn (Left) and I worked at Second Cup together this summer. She is taking Mass Communication to head into advertising and lives downtown with her boyfriend. Hopefully this clears up some of the confusion. "First Year Kristen" and "Second Cup Kristin" are lame and outdated names, but they will have to do for now.

Fall In The City

It is cold and rainy, Fall is definitely here. On the bike to work today I saw a red maple, it was beautiful. The leaves are all changing and it is really awe inspiring to be in a city where not only are there trees but the pollution levels are low enough to see them change to orange, yellow and red, not brown. Even though Spring and Fall are my least favorite seasons I have to admit it is very pretty. Interesting here though is people don't seem to rake their yards. It was a matter of pride in small towns to have a green leaf free lawn right up until it is covered in snow. A constant fight between child and parent, an annoying chore, but the leaves where always bundled into bags to raked to the curb. Here no one seems to care, leaves are all over the ground.

Liberty

No bra.
Pie without a plate.
Late night TV.
Living Free.

100th Post

Yes, this is post number one hundred. This is my first and only blog, and since starting it on June 12th, 2006, I have had 100 different things to say to the world. I have also had 200 unique profile views (it is a day of even numbers). I followed in Ami's foot steps and encouraged others to follow as well. Blogging is "the hip thing to do these days". It has even spawned t-shirts that say "No One Cares About Your Blog" which is actually true. But it isn't going to stop me. Here's to my next 100 meaningless things to say and publish!

Blank

I have been feeling weird for about the past month. I can't figure it out. I think need to cry. I actually can't really remember the last time I had a good cry, and I want one. With a lasting length of between 10-30mins, serious tears, runny nose, shrugging shoulders, gasping. Cause it is cathartic, and I know that it would make me feel whole again. Amusingly, I sometimes try to cry, and it hasn't happened, I guess I'm not putting enough or the right amount of effort in. If this keeps up I'm going to have to watch a movie that I know will make me cry, A League Of Their Own or Armageddon, I have both.

Super Geeky Adorable

This is so cute! And Fitting! I tend to always fall in love with dorks. I don't feel bad about saying this because 1 - W. knows he is nerdy and 2 - I found out yesterday that W. doesn't even read my blog, jerk. As usual I found this on one of his bookmarks. It is from XKCD, "a webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math, and language" made by Randall Munroe.

CD Release

Today, Our Lady Of Bloodshed, released their second CD, "Consume Control Conform". You can order a copy from their website/myspace (see Links to the right) they have pictures, bios, news, show info and song samples. If you live in the Southern Ontario area, go see one of their shows, Screamo music is perfect for the Halloween season and they have tons of gigs coming up. Hopefully they will do an Ottawa Area tour in the near future. Yes, My Little Brother Mike is the drummer, Yes, that is a photo of him, Yes, he does pretty much look like that, Yes, I'm really proud of him.

Riding Passion

We must learn to control our passion as a rider controls his horse. Like a horse, without discipline, understanding, and guidance, our passion can become unruly, dangerous, and move forward without its rider. This doesn't mean that we should forget our dreams and completely rein in our desires but keep our passion alive by making sure it is well cared for, fed, encouraged and loved. We need to not let the disappointments and lows take us into such deep depression and even the great times, when things are going extremely well, make sure not to jump so high with excitement that the fall is too much to bare. We should interact with our passions as if in a relationship, focused internally, move away from competition and comparison. Be alone and in control of the ride.

Beta

I switch my blog over to Beta style, whatever that means. Blogger.com wanted me to, so I did it. I'm worried that it may have changed in some awful way, but it appears just the same. Let me know if you notice anything different.

Grissom And I Are Tight

I have been watching a lot of CSI lately, the original one, none of this NY or Miami stuff. I love this show. At first I thought it was a little too scary and graphic for me, but I have been able to get to sleep fine after watching it so I guess it isn't. I can actually say (and this has happened on more then one occasion) the little one liners that Gil Grissom says before commercials along with him. This is because they are only slightly witty and really predictable, but it makes me feel like we are connecting on a very deep level. Now Ami can actually do an amazing and hilarious impression of Horatio from CSI:Miami, but that show is awful, I can't even watch it.

To All The Doubters

Yes that is a Yam and Mashed Potato Ying Yang. So to all who said it couldn't/shouldn't be done. I did it! I went there! Move over Martha Stewart I'm going to be the next.....whatever it is you are.

Mouse Crisis

I was setting the table for Thanksgiving dinner in Le Manoir. A cute little grey baby mouse walked into my sight in the sunroom. It seemed calm and just walking around when I noticed Binx was stalking it. I started screaming at her, but she just kept following the mouse about 3 inches behind it. The little mouse really didn't seem to mind and popped down a hole. I was still screaming at Binx to get away from the hole when the mouse popped up again (this is a very dumb mouse, according to Darwin it should probably die.) The mouse started walking around again with Binx following it. I ran to the phone to call W. in screaming crying hysterics, all the while I could hear squeaky little mouse screams. Convinced Binx had killed the mouse and it was lying somewhere in the dining or sunrooms disemboweled I called everyone I could think of to come rescue me. Steph, My Cool Boss, W., everyone just laughed at me. I snuck back to the area on total edge only to find no dead mouse and another (or the same) little grey mouse wandering around.

Advertising

Subway making fun of The French? No way, that is too awesome! Actually it obviously was intended another way and just didn't end up getting the desired point across. Because of my minor in Mass Comm, the draw of working in marketing, and my friend Kristin, I have been more and more interested in advertisements especially interesting and creative ones. I found a couple really good sites about it. Including Rejected Online, a site that has a collection of banned, rejected, spoofed and complained about ads, including this Subway one. Also another blog all about different ads, most of which are really innovative How Advertising Spoiled Me Hehe, The French are chicken, way to say it Subway!

One Sentence

"(My mother called me to do a chore and i responded, "What you need, Woman," to which my father chided, "Your mother is NOT a woman!")"[sic] This is a "story" from a website I found in W.'s bookmarks. W. has some really good links on his computer. It is simular to PostSecret (see Links to the right) most are pretty moving and sad. People submit true stories but only a sentence long. Check it out, I have also added it to the Links to the right.

Dollar Store

A new dollar store is opening up near me. I'm very excited, because I'm broke and cheap. I love dollar stores and use them for everything: housewares, school stuff, presents for friends (I admit it), sometimes even food. Big Buds downtown, which was never really all the cheap closed down and is going to be a "Dollar It" and that is also what is opening near me. I don't know how good it will be, but I hope everything is a dollar, instead of one, two, or three dollars. It will never be as good as Dollarama which is amazing, but at least it will be super close, no buses needed.

McLoser?

Patrick Dempsey, who plays Derek aka McDreamy on Grey's Anatomy, was in an 1987 teen chick flick as a geek. "Can't Buy Me Love" is basically a reversal of "She's All That" except instead of a bet, the loser boy buys the popular girl. Of course the usual stuff happens, he changes for the worse, betrays his friends, loses the girl, the secret gets out etc. etc. But happy ending and worth a watch because at age 21, Dempsey is really cute.

Good WIll Hunting

Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll give it a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. So I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never had a problem with get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Send in the marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number was called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some guy from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes home to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile my buddy from Southie realizes the only reason he was over there was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish to scare up oil prices so they could turn a quick buck. A cute little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And naturally they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin' 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what do I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. Why not just shoot my buddy, take his job and give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president.

Play For Me

It is the hottest thing in the world when someone can play an instrument or sing. Male or female, it is so impressive. Especially when they are just regular normal people, who happen to be musically talented in some way. Drums, Guitar, Piano, String instruments, or Voice. I would almost say I'm more attracted to a guy who can create music then one who can dance. I love sitting in relaxing settings just listening to someone play songs. Ok, that is a lie, I actually love it when they are playing something I can sing along too. I'm not into music but I'll tell you, I'm into regular guy musicians.

What to do?

I'm sitting here, and I have no idea what to do with myself. The problem is there are tons of things I could and should do, I just don't feel like doing any of them. I can't figure out what it is I want to do right now. I should clean the bunny cage, do homework, assignments, study, eat breakfast, do laundry, tidy my room or desk, brush my teeth, and get dressed. I could do anything I wanted like watch TV or a movie, write, paint, read, bath, workout, go for a walk, run or bike. I just am so bored and unmotivated. I have to work in a few hours too so that isn't helping. All this is making me cranky, and I hate being like that. It feels like I have been moody and cranky a lot more then usual lately, and I don't know why.

Night Out

Evening out with Ami. Laughing and Laughing and Laughing. Shhhhhh... Shhhhh...

House or Colbert?

This is an age old question, one of great importance. Which is more attractive House, from House M.D. or Stephen Colbert, from The Colbert Report? I have debated this back and forth. Who has the better body? more confidence? charisma? greater sense of humor and wit? Who would be better in bed? The questions flow and there seems to be no easy or simple answer. Both are such excellent representations of the perfect guy. Last night, after watching House M.D. I tuned into The Colbert Report and Stephen actually talked about House. It was an amazing television moment for all House/Colbert worshipers out there, male and female. [Link no longer active] In a segment about The Horsemen of the A-Pop-Calypse which mentions Greys Anatomy, Jackass and Justin Timberlake, hilarious. Funny as it was though, it didn't help with the question about which is hotter.

Goodbye Psychology

This morning I dropped my Psychology course and therefore my minor in Psychology as well. It was a low priority and I didn't enjoy it. There is just so much reading and I want to do well. I haven't even broken the seal on the text book yet, I will be able to return it and get my money back. So now I'm just an English Major with a Mass Communications minor. I have dreams though, big dreams. I want to work up north in the territories, do a school or work exchange to France, write my LSAT and go to law school, maybe even teachers collage. It is good to have dreams, today I dropped a class, tomorrow I will pick up the world.

When Animals Attack

At home, a large house in small town southern Ontario, I had a large upstairs room with three large windows. My bed was usually positioned in the far corner, a corner of two outside walls. There were squirrels, possums, raccoons, coyotes, or bears in the attic right above my bed. For the last couple of years that I lived there I could hear animal sounds. Mainly them eating the beams above my head. I had terrible visions of these wild (and possibly rabid) animals eventually crashing through my ceiling onto me in bed. Now here, in Le Manoir the huge house in the city, I have animals near my bed again. The are in the outside wall at the head of my bed, right behind me as I sleep. I know they are smaller, cause we are in the city, and because the space inside the wall isn't big enough for a bear or even a raccoon. I don't hear much chewing, alot of running, scratching, and general animal noises. I think it is mice, chipmunks, or squirrels. I'm not as scared anymore, just unimpressed, can't nature just leave me alone?

Fall

tiny red and pink
beating strongly
so small against the empty darkness

black
the soul has not rotted
the soul is gone
hallow

constricting inside me
choking consuming
stomach chest throat
mind

Hoes

It is hard to understand when someone in your life brings back into their life a person who has hurt them in the past. I have a number of guys I know and care about who right now are with (or semi-with) girls that they left in the past. They left them for good reasons, the girl had cheated or lied or they were a really bad fit as a couple. I had to listen to the pain and anger caused by these whores only to find out later that they were in a "positive" position again. Why take them back? Why even think about taking them back? Why complain to me and others about what horrible a person they are, if you are just going to date them again? I know relationships are complicated, and that this happens across the board, but it seems in my experience right now that guys are the dumb, weak, manipulated ones. People learn dammit! She is a lying cheating hoe.

Imax Dome

I hadn't ever seen an Imax movie in the Imax Dome, until today. My Aunt has been down for the past few days and I have been taking her to see the sights of Ottawa. Today we spent at the Museum Of Civilization, my favorite. Because Aunty Laura is a stamp collector we spent most of our time in the Postal Museam, which was really interesting and fun, since it was interactive. I got to play games, draw pictures, and fill out tests, I like to be amused. We also did a quick run through the Children's Museam, and wandered through Canadian Hall. The Imax movie we watched was Deep Sea. It was narrated by Johnny Depp and Kate Winslet (her voice gets annoying quickly). I loved the film, except they made the underwater sound effects too strong and very fake sounding. The photography was brilliant though, and I couldn't believe my eyes at some of the amazing animals. It was a beautiful film.

School Ring

I'm wearing my high school ring today, also my high school gymnastics hoodie but that is another story. The ring is on the ring finger of my left hand. I think this is where wedding rings are supposed to go, so I guess I'm married to my education, which is about right. I got the ring the year I graduated and it is beautiful. My parents got it for me from the downtown jewelry store back home. It is tiny, and has a little red stone in it, Garnet I believe. I wanted to change some things about the ring but couldn't. I wanted a ruby stone. It is silver and I would have preferred white gold. It is hallow, like most school rings, and I wanted it filled so it would be solid. I wanted to writing on it switched, the PDHS more indented then the year (2003), but the mold was for the other way around. I realize now that I love it just like this. I was being irrationally picky and snobby. It is perfect the way it is, wearing it is really making my day better.

So Fast

I biked to class today, it was so fast!! Walking in the winter from Le Manoir to Campus will be hard to do, so slow and cold. I could not believe how quickly I got there this morning though, I would be lying if I even said 5 minutes, it was more like 2 and a half. Most of the time was spent waiting for the light to change to go across the main street. Of course once I got to class the room had been moved across campus, what a pain.

Such A Lush

I don't understand it, every time Ter and I hang out, I get drunker. Her boyfriend and I were very out of it, but she just felt a little tipsy. It was a great weekend. I went to see "The Last Kiss", it was decent, if you liked "Gardenstate" you would enjoy it. We spent an afternoon at the St. Jacobs Market, which is huge and amazing. Went out for dinner and drank in the Waterloo Campus Bar. Sunday we drove to Guelph to visit Lina in her adorable stone cottage, she cooked and fed us (shepherds pie) like the incredible housewomen she is, also we stopped by at Teri's cousins little apartment. It was such a good trip, lots of hanging out and catching up with the Crazy T.

Happy Birthday Teri

-September 14, 1984- Teri, Crazy T, T*, Best Friend T, Ter is born
-September 8, 1991- Teri and I meet
-November, 1993- Teri and I become each others closest friend
-August, 2003- Teri and I leave our hometown for separate Universities
-July, 2005- Steph takes this photo and captures Teri's quiet grace and beauty
-September 14-18, 2006- I leave Ottawa to spend Teri's Birthday with her for the first time in four years

Looking Up

[Photo of wall quote lost.] I just spent the past few hours getting my notes in order from this past week. I'm feeling a little more confident about this school year and am not feeling as sick. I'm going to have a little nap before working some more at getting my life in order. The photo is of a recent purchase, it is a quote that sticks to your wall. I think it is beautiful and inspiring. I have placed it near my desk so I can see it as I work, it is perfect for an English Major. Although beautiful and bought in a chic home decor store, it is actually from Hamlet's famous soliloquy "To be or not to be" which is about his thoughts of suicide. To me the quote is amusing, slightly morbid, and beautiful. I love having it up on my wall.

Losing Control

I seem to be having issues again. Spending, health, class, etc. I don't understand, I can spend a full or half day being very productive and healthy and then an hour later buying things I don't need and can't afford, eating things that are unhealthy, or just skipping meals all together. I start running late for things, resenting class, and avoiding doing simple readings. I have no access to money (nothing in my bank account and credit card cancelled) so I'm going on my trip this weekend for T*'s birthday with no money to my name. I don't know what I'm going to do for food and bar cover while I'm there. I feel behind in my classes and they have barely started. I'm sick, I have a cold and sore throat again, so I'm just this unhealthy, wimpy, pathetic, idiot.

Intense Heat

Last night I went and did 90mins of yoga in a hot room with Alex and The Popeye Boys. It was insane, afterwards every inch of me was covered in sweat, every part of my tanktop and yoga pants were soaked. I felt so refreshed afterwards though, almost like a detox. It was at Rama Lotus Yoga Centre downtown and I would like to start going there to do classes in the hot room regularly. A hot room which is kept between 38 to 41 degrees Celsius. Literally I was doing a low impact workout in a sauna for an hour and a half, crazyness.

Fall Schedule

Sore Throat

I woke up this morning and my throat was a little sore. I thought it was just raw from screaming and singing when I was out dancing with Jeska and a bunch of friends last night. I think now that it is actually a sore throat. The discomfort isn't that bad, I'm obviously heading to work tonight because it isn't a big deal, but I would like to get over it quickly and have no idea how to. Can't I just be and stay healthy dammit?!

The End Of Summer

we wave goodbye
we start at school
our breath hanging in the air
I see the clouds
fall is here
winter soon on the way

we drink
we sing
fuzzy paths traversed again
a song from Phil
a dream away
our innocence a little lost

we live for joy
we live for love
the summer gone at last

Neck

My pretty throat, my pretty hands, but it is Ami's pretty necklace.

Before And After

I now have a nice clean room. Jeska is coming to visit tomorrow so I needed it to be presentable. Don't look too closely at the second photo because it isn't quite finished yet, still some laundry to put away and tidying to do. Over 4 hours cleaning, I think I will rest for a bit now.

Home Sweet Home

With working at The Cup over and done with, I can now actually live in Le Manoir with my pets, my girls, my huge stock pile of food, my bed, my computer, and my clothes. I will finally truly live in this beautiful house and hang out in my wicked huge room. It is true that the home is where the heart is, in that case my heart is still with W. in his tiny room downtown. So many people, pets and things that I love are here though, so my heart is going to have to move. W. can come visit me here for a change!

Final Thoughts On The Cup

As I sit here after my final shift at The Cup, I feel the need to pass on some wisdom to any employees who will come after me. Take my advice with a grain of salt though, since all this knowledge didn't make my time there any better. I still had a crappy summer, and feel it is the coffee shop student job equivalent of hell. But here are some things I have learned about working there, and dealing with The Owner:
**Do not get taken advantage of. Learn your rights and use the Labour laws to your advantage. This includes: shift length, breaks, time between shifts, sexual harassment, wrongful dismissal, vacation pay, etc. This is a good site "www.labour.gov.on.ca/english/index.html"
**If you are scheduled for a shift that is against your given availability, do not work it. Also, don't feel responsible to find your own replacement, explain the error, and that The Owner should correct it.
**Book off time, on the calendar, well in advance
**Be nice to customers at all cost. Don't take them too seriously.
**Do not wander around town constantly in your uniform, no matter how tempting simplifing your wardrob down to one black shirt and sweat pants may seem.
**Get to know your co-workers. Have fun with them on your shifts. Look out for each other, and work as a team. Play games. Learn what they like and don't like to do so you can work together.
**In terms of food and drink, when in doubt, pay. If you are paying, print out a receipt, put it in the cash, and sign it. The Owner sometimes likes to get accusatory.
**Come to work early. Be at the line, in uniform, at least 10mins before your shift. This helps with communication at shift change.
**If something goes wrong and it in anyway can be blamed on The Owner, do so. He barely takes responsibility for the business or his errors.
**Keep the smokers on the patio in their proper section.
**Change the grinds garbage often.
**Wear comfortable shoes.
**Do not take anymore responsibility, holding a key, opening and closing are enough. Any mention of management, leadership, scheduling, training, or ordering decline immediately, it is not worth the time and hassle.
**Above all, enjoy yourself and don't take make the job personal!

Food? Maybe Not Yet

I think I am on the other side of this bug that has been attacking me for the past few days. I just finished eating some oatmeal and hopefully it is a step in a healthier direction. Mind you I had a bowl of soup last night with some disastrous results, and this oatmeal isn't sitting all that well. I had thought I had food poisoning, but since Ami and now W. seem to be also sick I think it might have been a flu thing. I haven't heard of any bug being passed around, so I guess I started it. Go me for starting something, too bad it is something that is so very bad. It is also unfair since even though I hate needles I am always a good flu shot getting girl. This flu got me early though, they haven't even started with the shots yet. Man I'm ahead of the curve and starting a trend, who know I was so cool. Well, like all the 'cool' girls, I have to go throw up.

The Sweetest Thing

I think the sweetest thing is possibly Mike's blog post about Kristin and Loki [Link no longer active.] But a close second happened tonight (between my fevered and flu filled tossing and turning, since I'm still very very very very sick.) My dear friend started officially dating a guy she had been seeing. When I hugged her and said "Eeeek, you have a boyfriend." She replied with "It isn't that I have a boyfriend, it is that I have HIM." That is real folks, that is real.

Very Sick

I'm more than a little ill. I don't know what came over me, I was a little cold and my body ached a lot yesterday, but what ever this is it just totally hit me. I was walking downtown, after browsing a used book store with W. and had to run to a nearby sub shop, where I was sick. I have never been that violently ill in my life, it was awful. Now I'm just at home, resting and whimpering.

Slowly Starting

I'm slowly starting to watch what I eat and trying to be more active. At The Cup I only drink water. "Water is the only drink for wise men" - Henry David Thoreau. I still eat the food though, and it is filled with sugar and carbs. I hope to start going to the gym regularly once school starts and I'm on campus 4 times a week. "The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass" - Martin Mull. As you may have noticed, I also have been drinking a bit more regularly, I think it is a last string attempt to get some partying into the end of the summer. Soon I will leave the martinis and embrace the Weight Watchers. August is over, I think Fall is here.

I Can Be Cute

Drinks at 18eighteen with Ami. I ordered a Nights In White Satin, a white cranberry martini, since Cosmo said it was the new thing, also it was among the cheaper drinks on the menu. The very very thin waitress messed up my drink and used regular cranberry, so it was red and not white, she gave it to me, free of charge, and made the right one. Slightly tipsy, we headed home, I walked from the bus stop to the house without my shoes, because they were hurting my feet. I think I look a little like a librarian? Oh well, I was having a "Nothing To Wear" & "All of my clothes are either dirty or don't fit" Dressing Crisis, so I'm glad I was able to pull this night together and head out on the town for an hour or so.
"Nothing like two girls on a median."-Me, August 30, 2006

Urban

Two perfect people, sitting in a window
Perched on bar stools at Herb and Spice
Drinking Perrier and Orangina
A spoon sits in her yogurt
They are eating organic fruit, free-trade chocolate
They have no nationality
So blended, so melted, their faces so beautiful
Latin American, Asian, White
So polished, dressed up in a stripped shirt
Manicured toes placed in delicate sandals
She stretched
He smiles

I watch them from my seat in the bus
Slowly moving towards home
Eating the cold fast food fries sitting beside me
My pants too low and my tight shirt, weight gain
Thrown together, they don't match
Round cheeks and dark eyes
Smelling of coffee and sweat
I worked all morning, drank iced tap water
I turn away from them

Post Secret

This is a postcard from one of my favorite sites/blogs, Post Secret. (Post Secret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard.) Legally, no image from the site may be used for any purpose without written authorization, with one exception; I can post one image as a link to the site. I have been waiting for a postcard to come along that really speaks to me, to use as a link from my blog to the site. Post Secret updates every Sunday and this week, this one really hit home. So visit the site, it is really breathtaking. See also my "Link's" on the side bar.

Quick Note

Just a quick note for Mozilla Firefox users: remember to refresh my blog when you visit it to get all the updated posts and comments. This is a good idea for any web browser because they often just show what was there last time, and you might be missing something. Something very very interesting from my little life, and we wouldn't want that.

Disney Princess

Am I a Disney Princess, or a prostitute? I took this quiz, and found out that I am Esmeralda, who frankly isn't a Princess, I think they are stretching it to "Disney Female Lead" .... unless ... she was a Gypsy Princess, which she may have been. They said I am "Mysterious and passionate. You are a survivor. Even though life has swung you some difficult situations you have a strong intuition that gets you through. Also, you have the capacity to sympathize and relate to a variety of different people." which isn't so bad. According to The Official Disney Princess Website, which is quiet scary and way too pink, the Official Disney Princesses are: Ariel, Aurora, Belle, Cinderella, Jasmine, Mulan, Pocahontas, and Snow White, no mention of Esmeralda!! Aurora, who is Sleeping Beauty, is my favorite. I love that movie. Aladdin is also one of the best Disney movies, but Jasmine isn't all that cool. There are tons of Disney Princess Quiz's online, take the test I took [no longer active], which as aforementioned, includes many Female Disney Characters.

NyQuil

From Denis Leary - (and he is right, I took it last night, GREATEST SLEEP OF MY LIFE)

"Tonight I'm on NyQuil and Sudafed. Let me tell you something, folks. Forget about cocaine and heroine. All you need is NyQuil and Sudafed. I'm telling you right now, I took the NyQuil five years ago. I just came out of the coma tonight before the show! I love NyQuil. Man, I love it! I love it. I love it. I love it. It's the best thing shit ever invented. Isn't it, huh? I love the name alone. NyQuil - Capitol N, small Y, big fucking Q! I love that fucking Q, don't you!? What a great advertising idea! Put a huge fucking Q on the box. They'll get high and stare at it. "The Q is talking to me! The Q is talking to me!" You just go right into the coma, it is unbelievable! We have reached the point where the over the counter drugs are actually stronger than anything you can buy on the street. It says on the back of the NyQuil box, on the back of the box it says, "May cause drowsiness." It should say, "Don't make any fucking plans! Kiss your family and friends goodbye. Will cause you to pass the fuck out" NyQuil, NyQuil, NyQuil, we love you! You giant fucking Q!"

Music

I had a revelation at work about music, while listening to Adult Contemporary, Channel 9 on our satellite radio. Older music is better. By older I mean 6 months old and back. This is because the listening selection is cleaner. By listening to current music, we are listening to hundreds of songs, many of which will never make it very high on the charts and never receive that much airtime in the long run. Right now, on any Top 100 Music Chart are artists and songs sitting at the bottom that are never going to raise very high, or be played on the radio in six months time. So I don't want to waste my time listening to them because in 6 months, to a year, even 10 years down the road will I be listening to or even remembering these songs? They are being played now though, across the country, on TV and radio, because they are "Hot" and "New". I don't trust anything just because it is "Hot" or "New". I want something "Good", "Catchy", "Familiar", or "Fun". If I listen to any music that is last season or older it has endured. The songs have had time to become some part of a time period of my life, even it it was just last semester. These older songs are now tied to certain memories in my mind, so I care about them more. I want songs that can stay around, by then I have learned the lyrics, and smile at the memories tied to them. I only want to listen to songs that have lasted through a few months of radio play, I don't want to listen to a bunch of crap that in the end won't make it long term. I like my music filtered!!

Ladies In Big Hats

I already love my house, my mansion, Le Manoir, and now it is even better. Ami and Ami's Little Brother Wes, who is really tall and buff now so not really "Little", totally cleaned up the yard. I'm talkin' 6 to 8 huge brush bags of stuff, and other bundles of branches. The lawn is all cut and the edges around our stone fence and flagstone walkway are all cleared with the weedwacker. It looks incredible. We have a beautiful yard. It feels like we should be hosting garden parties. Like the ones in the movie My Fair Lady or the book Little Women, with men in suits and women all dressed up holding parasols.

Goodbye Cup

I have to spend sometime tonight writing my official letter of resignation for The Cup. I don't feel that sad about it, though I just finished a shift that included me colouring in a colouring book, which was surprisingly enjoyable. I was making fun of my younger co-worker for doing it, then tried it myself and found it very calming. I will drop off the letter for The Owner tomorrow, and with giving two weeks notice that makes my last day Sept 5. I don't think I will have a "Chris is Leaving Party" because it is too depressing when no one comes.

"Don't they know that if you treat a woman like a possession or a man, she will eventually go crazy. But if you just treat her like a woman, she will function beautifully" - Ami, 20/08/06

Off Kilter

I have only been back in town for less then 10 hours, but something feels weird. The world of my life in the city seems to have shifted on its axis. I arrived at W.'s at 5:00, so there would be time for a quick shower and e-mail check before work at 6:00, also that is where my uniform was. Although his bike was on the porch and his computer screen was on, W. wasn't home and I have been really looking forward to seeing him. I called his cell and he is across three provinces visiting his brother for his birthday. (I'm sure he did tell me this, but it had slipped my mind.) I quickly caught up on Ami's blog and got all irrationally jealous and confused by who she went to Oz with this week. Work was dreadful and The Owner was much more negative, annoying, criticizing, and mean then I remember. All my friends seem to be behaving weird with me, not in a bad or good way just differently in some miniscule way. People say they can feel when there is a full moon, well it feels like there was one all week while I was gone and now I'm returning to everything being a tiny bit screwed up and I don't quite fit in anywhere.

The Cottage

I'm back, I'm tanned, I'm feeling great. Now I have to go and work, I sure that will ruin all that rested and relaxed progress I made.

Pink

Last summer, and the summer before, I bought alot of pink shirts. I have about 4 or 5 pink summer shirts, like tanks and halters, and a pink sundress, and even a pink sweatshirt. The thing is, this summer I keep looking for them and never find them. I just found them!! I must have done a load of all my pink and red clothes right before I switched houses in May, then I threw all the clothes into a suitcase for the move. I just pulled out one of my suitcases to pack for going to the cottage and it is filled with all of my pink stuff, and it is clean. I'm taking almost all of it with me, I missed it so much. I have returned, to pink.

I Want...

I'm going to the cottage tonight, I'm really excited. T* and Lean are going to visit me with their significant others, can't wait to party with them. Feels like I never see my friends from Paris enough. I have so many plans for this week: I want to skinny dip, I want to have a cheeseburger, I want to swim, long distance swim with someone beside me in the kayak, I want to sail in three different boats, I want to have a hot dog in Port Dover, I want to wear my hear in breads, I want to wake up before noon everyday, I want to start one morning with Amaretto in my coffee, I want to eat corn on the cob every night, I want to kayak down to see the nudist colony, I want Little Brother Mike to say he loves me, I want to wear down the callouses on my feet running on the sand, I want to spend the week without make-up or heels, I want to get an amazing tan, I want to roast marshmallows at a fire, I want to have ice cream at Udderlee Kool, I want to finish at least the three books I'm bringing with me, I want to go tubing with the powerboat, I want to have the greatest week ever!

Sorry Steph

I can't believe it, I got a phone call early this morning and Steph is at my house. It is the saddest thing ever that the first time she sees Le Manoir I'm not there. It is such a beautiful house and I wanted to show it to her. This summer has been hard with out her around. Mind you, lately my summers have been sucking, so it is all par for the course.

Stoned

Freakin out

An Oz Widow

W. got a second job. He seems to have fit it perfectly and really enjoys it. He is the night chef at the local chic bar/restaurant "Oz Kafe". He still has his old day job which means he sometimes works from 10am to 4am straight. We rarely saw each other before but now both of us are holding down two jobs, I start school in a few weeks and he is going back to Cordon Bleu in the winter. We will have to make adjustments to fit this relationship into our now even busier schedule, and I will have to get used to crashing at his house when it is convinient but not expecting him to be there. So, yes, it is after 3am and I was waiting up for him to come home, but bed his looking very inviting, even if it is empty right now.

Free Drinks Makes The Night Fuzzy

The Bulldog is not just a dirty almost empty club with bad music where you can dance on the bar while holding chains hanging from the ceiling during which a cute bartender sets fire to a pyramid of shot glasses, it is actually another world altogether.

Pretty Girls

You know that song "Some Guys Have All The Luck" by Rod Stewart, well I think it is true for girls as well, for Pretty Girls. Beautiful women with great bodies seem to just be better off in our society. I'm not saying that brains and personality and kindness aren't important, because they are, but just that pretty girls get a bit of a step up. Employers want them, and will let them get away with more, the service industry does more for them in terms of deals and discounts, men will spend more time and effort being their "friends". If you are pretty you just some how end up with more, free things, lapsed rules, better treatment, attention. I feel I need to focus on being prettier. In order to do this I need to be thinner. I want to lose all the weight I have been carrying lately that is sitting around my midsection, legs, arms, face and ass. I have been thinking about the Pretty Girls thing all day and the weight thing popped into mind after I split the back of my pants wide open at Subway today, adding more fuel for my male co-workers and cool boss to make fun of. Can't I have a normal day?

Relaxing at my cottage, PARTY!!

Ok, if all goes according to plan, and The Owner doesn't screw me over, I will be at my cottage, at Long Point from Aug 14th to 19th, I feel everyone should come by and visit. Chill with me on the sand, swim in the lake, watch for shooting stars at night, whatever. Also in October it is getting torn down so The Parentals can build their retirement home on the lot, which will be awesome. So next year it will still be a great place but it won't have as many beds or as much character as it does right now. So please come see me and it while it is still My Cottage and not My Parents House.

Moments

I'm feeling a little nostalgic, and want to spend some time thinking about some great times in my life. These are some of the moments where I have felt the most alive, when I was aware that the world was so much bigger then me and amazing. I tingled with excitement and felt that emotion was stretching beyond my body, so filled that my skin couldn't contain it.

-Dancing with My Junior High Girls at numerous talent-shows, with planned and practiced routines, including one to "Spice Up My Life" by The Spice Girls, huge makeup and wicked costumes

-12 U-turns and 8 Border Crossings in 3 days, my first Road Trip to Niagara Falls with T*, singing to mix CD's driving down the highway

-Making Hamburger Helper in numerous campgrounds with Little Brother Mike on our family trip Out East

-Taking the hottest guy in school, and my crush of 12 years to prom in my cute little purple car, Mark Stewart, no one at PDHS saw that coming

-Running fast down the dune from my cottage to the beach at Ipperwash ever year we rented, from Grandma's yellow lawn chair under to tree to my Mom's brown one on the beach, usually carrying freezies

Big Fall

I'm at Subway, and I totally just fell on my ass in front of a customer. I grabbed their bread and then turned to serve them and just crashed. I guess my weak ankle turned or something but I was sprawled out on the floor. It was super hilarious and embarrassing. It didn't hurt thank goodness because crying after that would have added even more to the humiliation. I'm going to have to have my Cool Boss look at the footage from the camera.

Fears

My Top Fears
1. Seaweed, lakeweed, jellyfish
2. Dead things, along the lines of roadkill
3. Paranormal things, along the lines of ghosts
4. Trains!!
5. Sometimes the dark

OC Transpo, At Night

Scary? Sexy? Either way, GREAT SHOES!! Oh how I love the bus.

Tarot Etc.

Tarot, Runes, Numerology, etc. This site is filled with different (FREE) ways to get answers from "beyond". It is fun, easy to use, super quick, and always an interesting way of viewing a problem or question. Check it out.

T* of the Ring

T* has many names, both in this blog and in life. Crazy T, Best Friend T, and now T*. I use them here to preserve her anonymity since I don't know of her feelings about having her name used openly on the net. Anyway, T* has been my best friend (even though as we age we release titles like that are dumb cause there are many different and important people in our life) since Grade 4, we met in Grade 2 though. A couple of years ago I purchased matching rings off the internet for us. Each a platinum plated silver ring with four parallel stones, mine Ruby's and hers Sapphires, although worth a fair amount, I got them quite cheap on eBay. T* wears hers almost everyday, and I lost mine. Thank goodness, she listened to my strict instructions and bought me a similar one for Christmas. I now wear it often and have tried to photograph it a few times, to no avail. So instead of my having a picture of my hand wearing the sweet little ring I have to write about it. So to summarize, I love the ring and I love T*, and miss her, alot.

Beach Burn

Today I went to the beach. It was a short bike ride away and I was only there for a few hours, but I got burnt. Now I'm going to close at The Cup (back to closes all this week, possibly a better shift for my sleep schedule) and I have the absolute exhaustion that only comes with a sun burn and day outside in the summer. The other thing is that only my back half is red, which means I spent too much time on my front reading trashy magazines. My bra is killing me, I'm boiling, in pain, and asleep on my feet. It won't be the greatest shift. But the day had swimming, sunning and even hotdogs in it, so it was definitely worth it. More so if this cools to a nice tan.

Beautiful

I can see you walking ahead of me, I walk faster to catch up
Your so tall, yet feminine
I watch you move your arm to touch your face
Moving so confidently, yet graceful
All in black, your long skirt flows softly in front of me
Very fashionable, yet subtle
Your bare shoulders lead to bare arms, you touch your face again
Arms so long, yet elegant
Tilting your head, your arms float through smooth motions
You seem mystical, yet real
I see your breath, then I see why
I see you flick the ash, my heart falls as I pass
And your no longer beautiful

I Should Never Go Hungry

I'm staying at W.'s this evening, since I open tomorrow morning. I wondered what we were doing for dinner, to which W.'s response was "What do you want to do for dinner?" After explaining that I was broke and up for anything he could afford, he told me he had pasta, flour, water, and maybe butter, and could I go put on a pot of water for "Pasta with Butter." In shock I responded with "I'm dating a chef, dammit, I should never go hungry."

Ok, So We Are Not Friends?

It is always a little painful to find out someone doesn't like you. I know this because it happens to me alot, I'm trying to mature, get used to it, and realize that not everyone will like everyone. What hurts much more though, is finding out someone doesn't like you who has been acting like they do for some time. People who don't like each other often have to deal with each other: work, committees, clubs, mutual friends, roommates, school, family etc. I don't think that people should be mean or rude when having to interact in different situations, obviously politeness and respect is extremely important. But, don't ACT like my friend if you AREN'T my friend. It is extremely two-faced and dishonest to go out of your way to talk to me, invite me places, there have even been people who hug me, while hating me. I don't care if people talk about me behind my back, we all do it, good or bad, friends or not, as long as it is relatively consistent to how I think you view me but don't give one impression to me, and another to others. If you are friendly with me and I like you, I'm going to assume we are, or have the chance of being friends. If someone appears to be friendly with me, I'm going to let my guard down to some degree, and there is nothing harder then doing that and finding out that the friendly person actually dislikes or even hates me. The number of times this happens to me is really starting to add up (at least 3 this summer alone). The number of people who don't get along with me is quite high, at least I know about most of them, or the verdict is still out, but I had better not "FIND OUT" that someone who has been all buddy-buddy with me is to be added to the list, cause I'm starting to get pissed off!!
IF YOU LIKE ME - BE MY FRIEND
IF YOU HATE ME - DON'T PRETEND TO BE MY FRIEND
Simple.

A Week At Home

This is my schedule for the next week, I will be at home every night. So in case someone is looking for me... parents, Crazy T., Ami, W., My Cool Boss (who now calls The Cup when trying to reach me which is unnerving)... you can call me in the evenings or stop by, cause the house is wicked and I always enjoy company.

Monday (24) - Sub 11-3
Tuesday (25) - Cup 6-11
- Sub 12-3
Wednesday (26) - Cup 6-12
Thursday (27) - Cup 6-2
Friday (28) - Cup 7-2
Saturday (29) - Cup 7-close

Early mornings, but that leaves me the afternoon for fun, I just have to be disciplined and get myself to sleep early each night.

Escher

M. C. Escher was a Dutch graphic designer in the early 1900's. His work is so interesting, detailed and mathematical. This is "Drawing Hands" 1948. I sketched this piece for a Grade Nine art drawing once, where we had to draw hands, I remember getting a good grade even though I was totally copying a master. I gave Escher credit though, so it wasn't plagiarism. W. also has a shirt with this picture on it. It is one of my favorite pieces, another great one is of a pond where you can see, the fish under the water, the reflection of the trees in the water and the floating leaves sitting on the water, impossible for the human eye. For more about Escher, Wikipedia is always good.

Question #1

I'm horribly depressed, I don't really know why, but instead of writing about it I figured I would share a part of the "Question Game" I always play, most often at The Cup with fun co-workers.

You are involved in one of each of these...To what capacity? and What type? A Theatre Production, A Movie, A TV Show, A Dance Production, A Music Album

Ok so these were my answers, feel free to post with yours.
*Theatre - I'm the director of my uncles play Feathers, it is a touring show so I get called back every now and then, get a good amount of money and fame, and I'm not around for the actual shows so my social life doesn't suffer
*Movie - Actress in an ensemble cast vingette style drama, that is Oscar winning and fairly meaningful, aka Crash, but about drug use, the new Traffic
*TV - Lead Actress in a Lawyer Drama, the new Ally McBeal/Practice, so done by David E. Kelly
*Dance - Ballet, I'm the lead, it is a new piece called Sleeping Beauty, it alternates between dances with the male lead fighting to wake me, and dream sequences with me where I show equal strength and power, it ends with Sleeping Beauty waking and a beautiful "pa de deux"
*Music - I'm the cover artist for Offsprings amazing comeback album that goes platinum and I win awards for my design as well

Ahhh, fantasy, always makes me feel a little better.

Me, Me, Me, Not Me

I guess we all leave a paper trail! If you Google "Christine Sweeton" and I suggest you do, as well as Google yourself and those you love, you get 18 hits that are all really small meaningless moments of my life captured online for some reason. If you image search my name (without the "s) you get the above picture. If you Yahoo search the same thing, you get the write up about my Athletic Award for Gymnastics Team Leadership from way back in high school, written by the Paris Star in 2003, something I'm actually proud of and love to look back at all the great gymnastic memories. Also on the Yahoo search is a link to someone who actually isn't me (all the other ones were/are) I gather there is a Christine Sweeton who visited some church in New York, and she is a missionary. I guess I'm not alone out there, eerie.