Why I Need To Run

I need to go from a run (or at the very least the gym) so badly.
-I hate my body right now, with reason
-I have been a little down lately and the endorphins would be helpful
-I have low energy but then struggle to sleep at night

Earth Hour

It has been a long time since I have had a good Ottawa Erin quote (Both Erins live in Ottawa now so I guess I should switch to the names used when they get tagged in Always Standing posts.) Erin AH has always had some of the funniest quotes. See: Balls, Bread, & Drugs.

So, out for breakfast with Steph and Erin AH. Talking about Earth Hour since it always falls around Steph's birthday and we usually do something fun, like play boardgames by candlelight. However, this year, Steph and I napped though it - which still meant lights off and energy conserved.

Me: So, what did you do for Earth Hour?
Erin AH: Oh, I don't do Earth Hour. I celebrate Human Achievement Hour.
Me: What?
Erin AH: Yes, I just go around and turn everything on.

Monday

I am having a hard time finding something to write about...

I went to my first group session at CAMH (Toronto's Centre for Addiction and Mental Health). It seems like it is going to be good, it is a 15 week CBT group for depression. Today was tiring, and there is homework. I'm glad I finished school before starting this, seems like it could be tough.

3am Update

Amount of sleep last night: 2 hours
Anticipated sleep tonight: 3.5 hours
Number of 5 Hour Energy Shots: 3 in 2 days
Number of cups of coffee: 2
Roll-up-the-Rim wins: 0
Units of chocolate: 5
Units of starch: 1
Texts tonight with Taylor: 67
Books out of the Ryerson Library: 18
Books out of the UofT Robarts Library: 14
Books out of the UofT Scarborough Library: 1
Number of assignments finished: 2.5

Not True!

Overheard from my cubical:
"Yes, sometimes a change is as good as a rest."
Besides that I just find the wording just so inspirational-speech cheesy, I don't think the statement is true. Yes, a change can charge you up again, get you excited, force you into action but rest is rest. Actually, I think rest before a change is most beneficial, to avoid burn out.

The Plan

Ok, it is late at night, and I had a can of pop, Diet MC Cola to be exact. The plan is to stay up and completely clean my room so I can start fresh and study tomorrow. I have a bag of chips to keep me company and motivated. I won't post pictures this time, but trust me, tomorrow morning my room will be beautiful!

Very Sick

I'm more than a little ill. I don't know what came over me, I was a little cold and my body ached a lot yesterday, but what ever this is it just totally hit me. I was walking downtown, after browsing a used book store with W. and had to run to a nearby sub shop, where I was sick. I have never been that violently ill in my life, it was awful. Now I'm just at home, resting and whimpering.

NyQuil

From Denis Leary - (and he is right, I took it last night, GREATEST SLEEP OF MY LIFE)

"Tonight I'm on NyQuil and Sudafed. Let me tell you something, folks. Forget about cocaine and heroine. All you need is NyQuil and Sudafed. I'm telling you right now, I took the NyQuil five years ago. I just came out of the coma tonight before the show! I love NyQuil. Man, I love it! I love it. I love it. I love it. It's the best thing shit ever invented. Isn't it, huh? I love the name alone. NyQuil - Capitol N, small Y, big fucking Q! I love that fucking Q, don't you!? What a great advertising idea! Put a huge fucking Q on the box. They'll get high and stare at it. "The Q is talking to me! The Q is talking to me!" You just go right into the coma, it is unbelievable! We have reached the point where the over the counter drugs are actually stronger than anything you can buy on the street. It says on the back of the NyQuil box, on the back of the box it says, "May cause drowsiness." It should say, "Don't make any fucking plans! Kiss your family and friends goodbye. Will cause you to pass the fuck out" NyQuil, NyQuil, NyQuil, we love you! You giant fucking Q!"

Energy

This is where all my energy goes. Tomorrow, I will serve both subs and coffee. I will smile at both the young kids on lunch break, drunk with excitement about going out for lunch. I will smile at the couples, drunk with alcohol going out for coffee. 11am until 4pm at Subway, and then 8pm-Midnight. I don't know how much longer I can do this. I make very little money and slowly lose my sanity with each 9 hour shift.