Staying On The Bucket List

We had a great time at the shark diving. The cage is attached to the side of the boat and the swells at our anchor spot made it feel like a water rollercoaster when inside. The water was very warm (over 19). I got to be a "double diver" and spent a lot of time in the cage.

All the other participates from our tour, and just over half of the boat got sea sick. Luckily Kristen, Noah, Jason, and I were spared, probably because we took Gravol the night before and right before boarding the boat.

We didn't end up seeing any Great White Sharks, but six Copper Sharks stayed around the whole time and they were beautiful to watch. It was very cool to see them under water and even when watching from the surface it was captivating.

Seeing a Great White in the wild is still something that I would really like to do. I guess we will have to come back!

Itinerary Update - Bit Of A Split Up

Pre-Scheduled Post: Sunday - Cape Town City Tour
As per our trip itinerary (bar any issues/changes/complications etc.) we will split up ....

Mom and Tessa will join the Winelands Tour along the country's principal wine route to the scenic towns of Paarl, Franschhoek and Stellenbosch with tastings along the way.

Kristen, Noah, Jason, and I will take a full-day excursion to "Shark Alley" to experience great white shark cage diving.

All Here

Big meet up in Cape Town Airport - just before midnight Friday, with Kristen and Noah's plane landing just 10 minutes before ours. Asked a lady from our Gate 1 Travel group to take the first photo of us all together as we gathered before getting on the bus to the hotel. She got this one of us chatting as we got into position, so it is the actual first shot and I like it!

From Left: Noah, Kristen, Tessa, Jason, Me and Mom

Cape Town Airport 2018

New Milestones

The following photo, and caption, was posted to Taylor's instagram a few days ago:

We measure the moment they take their first steps, first word, first day of school... but it’s the small milestones that make me all mushy. First LEGO set put together ALL BY HIMSELF! #excusemewhileicry #legomania #bigkidsclub

Congratulations Lochlan! And it doesn't look like it was an easy one. It is true that it is a milestone registered by parents (and relatives) and I don't think it is even a small one. Jason was really excited when his nephew reached an age were he could be given 'real' lego instead of the larger duplo style.

One Year

Jason and I just finished celebrating our One Year Wedding Anniversary during a weekend trip to San Francisco. (But we haven't eaten the special piece of cake yet.)

Riding On A Bus

Muni - San Francisco

Sunday September 24, 2017

Riding On A Streetcar

TTC - Toronto

Saturday September 24, 2016

Photo by Stephanie Beach Photography

A little side note, the sailboat necklace that you can see me wearing in the top photo was a gift from Jason on our wedding day. The necklace that I wore on my actual wedding day, seen in the second photo, was borrowed from my mom and features my father's wedding ring.

A Different Type Of Anniversary

A year ago today, Steph left her engineering job to focus all her attention on her business Stephanie Beach Photography. It was a very brave thing to do, I was very excited for her at the time. Everything is going well, she keeps exceeding her goals and is producing beautiful work - she is also much happier. Congratulations Steph, I am very proud of you.

The Cost Of Stamps

This is such a grouchy senior citizen post, but I can't believe the price of stamps now! If you just buy one stamp it is a dollar, when you get them in rolls or booklets it is $0.85. It is nice that they have the little P that means 'current domestic postage rate' so if it goes up you can still use it to mail a normal letter within Canada. But still, when did it get so expensive? How is this not a commodity market item?

I actually remember when it was $0.45 to mail a letter. I found a website that maps out all the postage increases from 1943 to now. It turns out the price I am remembering is from 1995, and for my entire elementary and high school life it was under $0.50. That milestone increase happened in 2005 so I was in university at the time and I guess I didn't notice. I am shocked at the cost now, it is just such a big jump.

It is the same story with gas prices too, I started driving when it was in the mid-sixties. However, I can remember it being in the forties when I was younger. Now it is regularly well over a dollar. (I am such a grouchy old person.)

Five Years And I Still Don't Like Coffee

Five years ago today I met Jason for the first time. We had been matched through eHarmony and quickly arranged to meet up for coffee, except I don't like coffee so I definitely had something else. I have different ways of explaining the matching process, or that first meeting, or our early days of dating. The bare fact is that we met up at the Starbucks at the corner of Bathurst and St. Clair (close to Rrunuv Bayit.) I was later told by Jason that the date was July 12. Seeing that later on we had agreed to use August 9 as the day we started a relationship, I was neither aware of or cared about remembering the specific day we met. However, each year Jason remembers this day and usually celebrates by bringing me Starbucks - but not coffee, I don't like coffee.

I can't believe that five years has gone by already. I love what we have done with this time together, I love where we are now as a couple, I love everything about him. Jason, I love you.

It Is Going To Be A Tough Week

I am still a bit down because of Father's Day and how much it reminds me of Dad's death. Unlike more organic remembrances, that may still be sad but are at least enjoyable nostalgia, Father's Day just makes me think about the fact he is missing from my life now. It is definitely painful. His birthday is also coming up on Wednesday so it is a rough time for grief all around.

My event is, and like all event planning, the last week is chaos. It is basically controlled panic. While I do enjoy it, I could never do events like this full time - too exhausting. Also, this is a massive event and there has been less time to plan it than normal, even for a smaller event.

Also, related to work, it seems local discontent is coming a bit to the surface, which in general is a good thing because it will allow me to address concerns and improve relationships. But really this isn't coming at a time when I have the time, energy, or even mental capacity to give it the attention it deserves.

One week from today, next Monday, I should be able to take a deep breath and feel more centered.

Happy Father's Day

Dad - I miss you.

National Siblings Day

According to my Facebook feed it is National Siblings Day. Though really it is only recognized in The States, everyone is posting photos of their brothers and sisters. I figured I would join the fun on Always Standing. Instead of posting a 'Throw Back' image, here is a recent one from September:

Mike and I at my wedding

September 23, 2016

Toronto City Hall, Ontario

Photo by Stephanie Beach Photography

He also was back in Ontario a couple of weeks ago. Instead of attending the funeral for Aunty Laura he chose to spend the money coming back to visit her before she died. He brought along Maya too since she is still young enough that you don't have to pay for an extra seat. Not only did they get to see our aunt but they spent a bit of time in Toronto with me too. I love hanging out with Mike, he is a great little brother!

One Year In The Force

Jason has been at his new company for one year today. When I previously mentioned it, I didn't say where. Well, I think a year in it is okay to say that he is employed in downtown Toronto for Salesforce, a company that works with Customer Relationship Management (CRM.) It has been nice to commute part way with him, and he is very happy not be driving each day as his last job was in Markham and not very transit accessible. I hope he continues to enjoy his job and love his work.

Execut-ing It Up

Last week, in a whirlwind - interview - job offer - contract negotiation - Board vote - start immediately - situation that spanned just four days, I became the Executive Director at The Junction Business Improvement Area. So I didn't really get much of an unemployment break at all. It really is great to be back in a BIA job, I love the concept so much. The title of Executive Director is exciting even if the realities of the position are pretty overwhelming. The neighbourhood itself is awesome, actually it is too cool for me but hopefully I will find my own way to fit in.

By the end of last week a press release introducing me to The Junction BIA Members (see left) had been sent out and people were already welcoming me to the area. The week is starting off with our website publishing the same announcement publicly. You can read it HERE.

Officially Announced

I have resigned from my position at work and HR sent out the email today to let the company know. Now that it is common/public knowledge I thought I would mention it here. My last day is March 3, 2017 and I am going to have to really ramp up my job search so that there isn't too much of an unemployment break.

We All Age

Here is an updated photo from Ter, her son very seriously proclaiming his age:

It is important to note that he isn't usually a serious little guy. He is full of laughter and smiles! Just the cutest.

Both photos are taken by Teri or Greg, they like to have fun planning and executing little photo shoots at home.

Shepherd's Wedding Cake

Pulled out a tupperware of what I thought was Shepherd's Pie from the freezer this morning so that it would be thawed to eat for dinner. I haven't really made shepherd's pie in a very very long time so I don't know why we would have it, but I thought it might have been put there by my mom.

Got home this evening ready to split it between Jason and I and warm in the microwave. When I opened the container I noticed that the 'mashed potatoes' at the top was in a beautiful rose pattern and realized that we had defrosted the top portion of our wedding cake eight months early. Oops!

I cut off a small part and put it in a labelled container to keep until our one year wedding anniversary in September - we will eat the rest for dessert tonight.

Note: Meg, Jason's sister, made our beautiful cake. Rich carrot cake with delicious cream cheese icing. Photo by Stephanie Beach Photography.

Happy Birthday Aves

I have been an aunt for two years now. I love this little rascal so much and I hope he has had an amazing birthday! I also hope that the coming year of 'terrible twos' doesn't drive his poor mother crazy. 

Avery Reading His Baby Sister A Story

Christmas 2016 - Edmonton 

Photo by me, with my phone 

Our 'Team' Style Wedding Concept

We had a strange wedding. It was strange in so many ways. From the science-referencing custom ceremony to the euchre tournament and other activities, a lot of what we did was a bit unusual for our crowd of friends and family. However, what I think was truly unique and the most special aspect of the whole event was just how much all of our guests were involved.

We had, 

what I have been calling, 

A Team Wedding

I don’t know how to describe this concept to those who weren't there, and even some of those who did attend may still be confused. However, Jason and I were thrilled with how everything turned out and I want to pass along the idea to other couples. So, I am going to try to explain what happened using the 5W1H technique from elementary school.

What?

A Team Wedding. A multi-day celebration that was built by our community of friends and family. A pot-luck lunch. Shared expertise. Friends as vendors. Participation in the ceremony and event in some way by every guest.

Instead of wedding gifts we requested that our wedding guests sign up for a 'participation' component of the wedding. This was an extreme level of the delegating that many wedding websites advocate for to help elevate the stress of planning such a large and complicated event.

It wasn't purely a pot-luck since it was much more involved and complex, also the participation expanded beyond food. It wasn't crowd-sourced in a conventional fund-raising way but the theory is similar.

Why?

Firstly, it was truly because we wanted it this way. I had envisioned this type of wedding for most of my adult life - not as extensive in terms of participation but I always liked the idea of involving people close to me to help put the event together.

We had noticed that the best events, especially weddings, in our memories were those that we participated in or helped with. The most personal events were those that had been prepared in love and collaboration. We wanted to re-create that type of occasion.

Secondly, we hoped it would help with cost. It was a rare suggestion, but we had seen 'ask friends and family to offer help and services' on a few 'how to plan a wedding on a budget' lists. Weddings are insanely expensive and we didn't want to cut back our guest list, which is the number one suggestion on all the aforementioned lists. Hiring the various vendors needed to have an event for 150 people, especially in Toronto, adds up quickly and eliminating those costs by having guests fill some roles would really help the bottom line.

How?

Confidence! Courage! Clarity! Consistency! Communication! Conviction!

Wedding planning is challenging. It took a lot of determination to stick with our vision and ignore the confusion, comments or judgement that might come our way. I think if we approached this concept in a questioning or timid manner it might not have turned out as well. But our ideas were met with love and support. We were the champions of our wedding and this concept, our guests were all on board.

As for the logistics, I will try to outline this using the remaining questions - Where, When, and Who.

Where?

Online. The choice to invite guests and coordinate the event digitally was partly born out of the desire to cut costs but mainly for the speed and ease of communication. Google Docs and emailing meant people could collaborate easily and having a wedding website allowed us to clarify details, storing important information for guests to reference later.

Also, our choice of venue at a community centre helped project the vibe of cooperation. We were left to our own devices without an event planner or venue manager. This gave us and our guests open access to a large kitchen, bar area, and event necessities like tables and chairs.

When?

We sent out the invitations very early. Our first email contacting our guests was in February, for a late-September event. This was not a 'save the date' we had location and timing details already. We used Google Forms for our invitations, I have made them public so that others can see what they looked like. We sent out an email inviting guests and asking that they complete a survey as their RSVP. There was an ADULT and CHILD survey. The important part of these forms is the bottom section where we provided a list of suggestions as to how guests could participate. We also made sure to mention in this initial email (and frequently reminded people) that we were declining wedding presents.

We sent reminders in April to those who hadn't yet responded. In May we thanked everyone for getting back to us and let them know we would be in touch regarding their possible role at the wedding. We spent the summer reaching out to everyone and asking for their help with various elements of our wedding.

Who?

To ease the planning process, and give people an easy contact on the wedding day, we designated leaders for each of the areas that guests were helping with. These close friends or family members then fully arranged a section of the event with people that they may have never met. We had Food Coordinators, Activity Leaders, Decorating Managers, and more. We could direct others to them with questions.

We know our guests well, which is why we wanted them at our wedding, and why we didn't want to have to cut down the guest list. So, we took our knowledge of their skills and interests into consideration when requesting their assistance.

And?

It turned out amazingly! Better then we could have ever imagined. Jason and I are so thankful to everyone who attended and assisted and made the day so special. We hope that our guests enjoyed themselves and felt like this style of Team Wedding, having everyone helping with the event, added to the experience. It was so touching to see what we all built together; it was a fun, beautiful, memorable, and wonderful day.

It Is Monday And I Am Married

Jason and I had our wedding this weekend. Everything was such a blur, my head is still spinning. I really don't feel ready to go back to work tomorrow and just want to spend some more time hanging out.

It feels amazing to be married and there is a small difference. I think it was something that was missing from our relationship, especially these last few months. Content, whole, calm, happy, complete - would all be used to describe how I am feeling today.

The wedding event itself was a multi-day crazy affair that was bigger and better than I could have even imaged. I will share stories and photos in the coming days.

Gender Neutral At 150

Today is Canada Day, as a country we are 149 years old. I can't believe that I will be around for the 150th anniversary next year. It is going to be big! I was in Grade 2 when we celebrated Canada's 125th anniversary, I remember the logo - I think I had a t-shirt with it.

If Bill C-210 passes its third reading and trip to The Senate we will have a change to our national anthem! It would make the English version gender neutral by replacing "thy sons" to "of us." The French version is very different, much more religious and violent.

Staying with the English version for now - I am surprised that it is moving to gender neutral lyrics before secular - since we will still be asking "God keep our land." I also think it is interesting in the Wiki article that Toronto City Council voted 12 to 7 (this was before amalgamation) to suggest a change to the Canadian Government. They wanted a change from "our home and native land" to "our home and cherished land" to better represent our large immigrant population. I like that change too! We should do all three at once - no "sons," no "God," and no "native."

I remember being part of Brownies or Girl Guides when a small movement towards religious differences was announced. I looked it up and in 1994, when I was 10, The World Association approved revisions to the Canadian Girl Guide promise and law. I remember the asterix section being added to our little printed cue cards:

Promise
I promise to do my best,
To be true to myself, my God/faith* and Canada;
I will help others,
And accept the Guiding Law.
* Choose the word God or the word faith according to your personal convictions.