30 Signs You’re Almost 30
It’s 11 p.m. and you want to go out NOW???
1. You get carded, and your first instinct is, “AWESOME.”
2. Instead of drunken party photos, your Facebook friends are all about the baby pics.
3. …and marathon times.
4. You get super excited when you go to a concert and there are SEATS.
5. You start a story with “when I was in college” and realize that was 10 years ago.
6. When you watch teen movies/TV shows, you find yourself siding more with the parents than the kids.
7. You’ve gone to a bar and left because it was too loud.
8. You have 10,000 business cards from old jobs that you have no idea what to do with.
9. You’ve become a sunscreen nazi.
… to make up for years of neglect.
10. You find cool celebs who are in their early thirties and think, There’s still hope.
11. You’re getting increasingly scared to check your credit score.
12. You’re seriously thinking about getting a dog. No, having a baby. No, definitely getting a dog.
13. You’d rather pay a little more for a “nice, clean” hotel room than cram into a hostel with 12 of your friends.
14. Everything cool is being marketed to people younger than you now.
15. You’ve definitely lost the enzyme that lets you digest Taco Bell.
16. There’s an increasing number of musical artists you haven’t even heard of.
17. Every night you’re like:
"I don't want to do things. I want to not do things."
18. You’ve experienced the dreaded TWO-DAY hangover.
19. You realize your parents were your age (or younger!) when they had you, and you start cutting them some major slack … and you view them more and more as friends.
20. Running hurts your knees. The elliptical hurts your knees. Everything hurts.
21. Teen slang makes you viscerally angry.
22. You start buying shoes based on “comfort.”
23. An 11-year-old has to show you how to do something on your smartphone.
24. Weekend nights: Instead of having two drinks at four different bars, you have two drinks at one bar then go home.
25. You voluntarily buy the “fiber” cereal.
26. You get really excited about lame stuff, like low interest rates.
27. You wonder, seriously, how you ever pulled an all-nighter.
28. You’ve uttered the phrase, “I’m too old for music festivals.”
29. You’ve graduated from Ikea to West Elm.
…or you at least WANT to.
30. You have been to a party where at least two of your friends brought their babies.
1 comment:
I'm going to the world's largest IKEA this weekend, on the private IKEA bus. And not only will I purchase IKEA goods, but I will also eat at the IKEA restaurant.
I moved to Sweden. I will NEVER outgrow IKEA.
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