Hansom Ransom
Don’t get me wrong, Christine’s cat (Binx) is great... but I think the canine variety is underrepresented in this blog. With that in mind, I would like to introduce my dog Ransom. My dog is a border collie crossed with an idiot. Seriously. He is a definite contender for the funniest/worst/best pet ever. That cute Labrador Retriever from the Marley and Me movie has got nothing on Ransom. Here is a list of Ransom’s shenanigans, which will remind the cat lovers why they love cats:
-- Eaten $120 worth of cash left sitting on my kitchen table
-- Consumed an entire bottle of Advil and a bar of soap to get back at us for leaving him alone for an evening (FYI: he survived)
-- Was recently kicked out of the groomer’s because he attempted to “herd” all the animals into a corner
-- Climbs the front windowsill while outside to check up on what’s going on inside
-- Ate Mark’s $200 mouth guard… then peed on his foot
-- Climbs into the shower to bathe with you and bite at shower head
-- Had a case of explosive diarrhoea on floor… which Mark’s slipped in while drunk
-- Attempts to climb trees to reach squirrels
If anyone thinks this list is too outrageous, I completely understand and encourage you to drive by my house any time and find Ransom keeping watch over the neighborhood from atop the rock in my garden:
No comments:
Post a Comment