Losing Control

I seem to be having issues again. Spending, health, class, etc. I don't understand, I can spend a full or half day being very productive and healthy and then an hour later buying things I don't need and can't afford, eating things that are unhealthy, or just skipping meals all together. I start running late for things, resenting class, and avoiding doing simple readings. I have no access to money (nothing in my bank account and credit card cancelled) so I'm going on my trip this weekend for T*'s birthday with no money to my name. I don't know what I'm going to do for food and bar cover while I'm there. I feel behind in my classes and they have barely started. I'm sick, I have a cold and sore throat again, so I'm just this unhealthy, wimpy, pathetic, idiot.